It is so hard to accept that events can be random.  Most of us like the illusion of being in control.  My actions lead to my earned reward or punishment. Be honest, when you hear someone was diagnosed with some horrible life-altering disease, does you mind start to create a pretty linear narrative for why that happened? A friend diagnosed with lung cancer “oh, she was a smoker.”   See how linear and clean this can be?  We have it all figured out.  Our brains crave order and a coherent narrative for our actions and motivations.

These rituals do not influence the outcome but don’t ask those of us who believe we are in control to accept that randomness rules our lives.Can you free yourself from self-blame when random tragedy hits?   I want an explanation. Tell me something that makes sense to my pea brain that  despite my good deeds and hard work and am now suffering from pain and disappointment. The journey there can be rough because bad stuff does happen to good people.